I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
