Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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