just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Found the puke drawer
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Randomize
