How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
