i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
