my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
