im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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