i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
