He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
