I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
