No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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