It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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