wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
