Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
