This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
how does that bad decision feel?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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