walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i think i have herpe
just one?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
