why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
