hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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