I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize