hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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