I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
