Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
