no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
