Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
