oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
