You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
