rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
