I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
