Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
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