Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
