I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm bleeding and have questions
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize