Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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