More tranny stories later!
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
