Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
