She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
