After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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