Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize