Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
