yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
You can't just leave with hair like that
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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