Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
