Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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