We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
