i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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