i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
My balls are so social today.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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