if i can run in heels then i can drive
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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