i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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