Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
