yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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