Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
