It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
